This week, I am trying to wrap up my assessments to send into the state because I plan to start this school year on August 20 (a week from today).

This process frustrates me every year. I do not believe that the state has a right to require this reporting, which makes it even worse. As a result, I am very resentful.

My biggest problem is that The D does not like to write and I do not make him. His fine motor skills are not the best and it is a frustrating process for him. Plus, he does not have the patience to struggle with writing something down when he can just tell it to me orally.

You have to understand, this kid has been through a lot this past year and, often, it is a struggle just to get through the day. For him and for the rest of us. He has been depressed, angry, and at times, even has wished he was dead. (For real, not as an attention getter.)

I am not going to waste our time fighting to get this kid to write down something that I know he knows just to satisfy some bureaucrats in Montpelier. Not a chance.

I could probably have him classified as “special needs,” but then my reporting requirements to the state get even more invasive.

I decided today to look into having a licensed teacher evaluate him, instead of doing a portfolio of his work. I found one who would be a great fit for us, but she charges $65 per child.

There is just no way we can come up with that. We just had to have our car fixed and we have a couple other big expenses coming up that are non-negotiable.

The only subject area that I am lacking portfolio samples for him is language arts, since it is the only one that requires the kind of writing that he does not like to do.

I guess we will just continue to work together, a little bit each day, to finish the last couple of pages I need for his portfolio. We did some work today and it went okay.

This is just so frustrating for me. I had a migraine and even started crying at one point today because I am so sick of this.

There is no need for the state to put homeschooling parents under such stress.

Sometimes I wish I could fight this, but I know that I cannot afford to take time away from my family right now, especially with everything The D is going through.

The time will come, though, when I can fight this, and I will.

That time is not now, though, so I just need to get through it. And I will; I just needed to vent.

I have also planned ahead, so that I will not be in this same boat next year. I realized today that if I just remain diligent in making him do a little bit each day, within the limits of what he can tolerate, and make sure that all of the little bits put together demonstrate everything that he has learned, I will have more than enough for the portfolio next year.